We had a minor trial this year that felt like a major trial to me. It bothers me how unlovingly I responded. I definitely had a lack of love. I did have some grace-filled times of handling it well but mostly failed to trust the Lord and failed to just rest in my husband's leading. My goal this year is to pursue love. Hopefully to pursue it to my own hurt. I am partly afraid to start though because sometimes I am good to have a plan but not so good with the follow-through. :( So, little blog, please help to keep me accountable. :) This isn't scripture but Rory (thislifeilive.com) said, "If you want 'that kind of love,' you must give it first." I have been so inspired by the way they have loved each other well...to the end (as he lost her to cancer :( ) They fit "a lifetime of love" into only about 13 years of marriage. They actually went on their first date literally the day before Derrick and I went on ours. They went February 14th and we went February 15th of 2002. They were married just before us and we married on June 29th of 2002. And, besides all that, Rory surprised Joey with a vow renewal in a church for their 10 year anniversary just like Derrick did for me! Wild. All of this paralleled and we didn't even know of them until this past March when Joey died and we were on our way back from visiting Gma Joy in Kansas. I read Rory's blog aloud to Derrick much of the drive from Kansas to Oklahoma. Derrick had shown me videos of, "A Bible and a Belt" and, "That's Important to Me." I adored them at this point and then he told me about Joey dying. :( We went far back in Rory's blog to put it all together. Neither one of us had a very long courtship, that's for sure and I find it crazy that our stories parallel each other! I had to ask myself if I've done well at loving my husband in the time the Lord has given us. I want to love him better and I want to be intentional with the time the Lord is giving us. There is actually a song by Joey+Rory that is very precious called, "In the Time That You Gave Me." I really hope to begin a year that strengthens us in love and then just overflows into a lifetime (or however much time we get) of loving well. So, I'll be posting my goal for the month of August soon...It will be based on the love chapter- 1 Corinthians 13. I will write what I plan to apply from it. I am continuing to read my companion book about pursuing love by Jonathan Edwards. He was one of the greatest preachers of all time and I believe has written most extensively on 1 Corinthians 13. And so, we now begin- all the way to next August, right?? Praying, Oh my precious Lord (the One who saved me, the One that loves me with an undying- always and forever-love, the One who has a plan for me), my Abba Father, please help me to grow in love. To love You better, my husband, and others.
Charity and Its Fruits (Jonathan Edwards)- "And after His ascension, the apostles were full of the same spirit in their epistles abundantly recommending love, peace, gentleness, goodness, bowels of compassion and kindness, directing us by such things to express our love to God and to Christ, as well as to our fellowmen and especially to all that are His followers. This spirit, even a spirit of love, is the spirit that God holds forth greater motives in the gospel to induce us to, than to any other thing whatever."
He then talked about the most perfect and beautiful expression of love known to man, Jesus' dying on the cross and taking the punishment that we deserve- "The work of redemption which the gospel makes known, above all things affords motives to love; for that work was the most glorious and wonderful exhibition of love that ever was seen or heard of."
~When I say, "year," I guess I mean school year.
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